Please Don't Feed the Animals: Trollblood Theme Lists

Hi, all. Yet another long hiatus; lots of life things going on which have been keeping me away from blogging and hobbying in general. So, I got a new phone and War Room was the first app I installed. This led to some list making because I had that oh-so-delicious blank slate under my Armies tab. I wrote up Runes of War so it was there and my variation of Calandra's Tier 3 Evolutionary Elementalism, which is a blast to play by the way. Bah, I might as well discuss my version while I'm mentioning it. My list makeup is:

50 points
Calandra Truthsayer, Oracle of the Glimmerwood - WB: +5
-    Pyre Troll - PC: 4
-    Slag Troll - PC: 5
-    Slag Troll - PC: 5
-    Storm Troll - PC: 4
-    Storm Troll - PC: 4
-    Winter Troll - PC: 4

Krielstone Bearer & Stone Scribes - Leader & 5 Grunts: 4
-    Stone Scribe Elder - Elder 1
Trollkin Runeshapers - Leader & 2 Grunts: 4
Trollkin Runeshapers - Leader & 2 Grunts: 4
Trollkin Warders - Leader & 4 Grunts: 8
Trollkin Warders - Leader & 4 Grunts: 8

Beasts: I was compelled to have at least 1 of every elemental troll in this battlegroup but they all have purpose. Believe it or not I find the Pyre to be the least effective in most cases; however having the continuos fire and fire immunity is nice. The winter troll is actually nice to take out stealth models or models dug in behind walls. I actually targeted my own warder in order to kill Gorman last game I played. Sprays are always good even if you have the crazy anti-infantry of Stormtrolls in your list.

Units: this one is fairly obvious; two units of warders is fucking good, no matter how you shake it. I also took two units of Runeshapers as well because they are more accurate then the trolls despite having the same range and using them as a means to knockdown a unit to tie them up is worth 4 points in my opinion. They also have pathfinder which is great for this list. I skipped out on Whelps because Calandra's soothing song covers my fury management and Janissa was left out because she would be used in Runes of War(character restrictions).

If you haven't played a variation of this list, I highly suggest trying it out because it is a good deal of fun. I played around with the notion of putting a Mountain King in but I can't see an angle to make him not be a liability. Next list is a Jarl Tier 4 Highwaymen list that I have not played but would love to try(hint, hint to my friends). The list is as such:

50 points
Jarl Skuld, Devil of the Thornwood - WB: +6
-    Troll Impaler - PC: 5
-    Troll Impaler - PC: 5
-    Pyre Troll - PC: 5
-    Swamp Troll - PC: 4

Stone Scribe Chronicler - PC: 2

Kriel Warriors - Leader & 9 Grunts: 6
-    3 1 Thrower's: 3
-    Kriel Warrior Standard & Piper - Standard & Piper 2
Scattergunners - Leader & 9 Grunts: 8
-    Scattergunner Officer & Standard
- Officer & Standard 0
Scattergunners - Leader & 9 Grunts: 8
-    Scattergunner Officer & Standard
- Officer & Standard 2
Sons of Bragg - Wrathar, Tor & Rhudd: 6

Beasts: my thought process on this one was that having two Impalers handing out Snipe was better than one. Having Reach beasts to combine with Charge of the Trolls from the Chronicler seemed legit as well. The Pyre is there mostly for the damage buff which would be put on the SoBs. The Swamp Troll is one of my favorite lights, especially when coupled with Snipe. Consuming a solo or dragging a warcaster/warlock in so the rest of your force gets free reign to beat on him is great.

Units: I took what I had to take but I feel Kriel Warriors are sweet with Jarl in theme or not. With quicken and them praying swiftfoot, on top of the tier bonus, your kriels can be 28"/31" from your board edge turn 1. Luckily for you, all those models that decide to engage them will get sprayed down next turn with scatterguns that ignore friendly models. The SoBs are in there for the weaponmaster trait mostly, they are a good unit but need a good screen to survive.

Solos: the only solo is the chronicler. This model is all round awesome. That first round when you are going to run those Kriels 31" up the board, make sure you use Heroes' Tragedy on them first. Up against a shooty list? Then have Jarl cast Weald Secrets on the Kriels and the chronicler tells the Tale of Mists; DEF 16 Kriel Warriors. Both work great and with Jarl's feat you can get your concealment and counter-KD too.

This list is in your face fast. It lacks a bit in the ARM cracking department but it seems like a decent list all together. Well, that's all for now. See you real soon!

Bang Your Heads: Gojira and Mastodon at Starland Ballroom

On November 1, I got the pleasure of once again seeing the bands Gojira and Mastodon on stage once again for Mastodon's tour of One More 'Round the Sun tour. I had seen both bands in New York in early spring and the show was amazing. In July, I was visiting some friends in Baltimore and got the idea of buying some tickets while having a nice brew at a bar. And there it was; the same show, close enough to me and on a Saturday. At first I thought it was a dream but I snapped back to reality and promptly bought tickets. Neither band is ever a let down.

The above picture is Gojiro playing their 8 song set. I would love to see them as headliners. They are such a great band live; super tight and whoever does their live mixing must be some kind of savant. I have no complaints, even though they didn't play "Flying Whales" the set list was still killer. This band is an absolute joy to see live and I highly recommend giving them a shot if you haven't listened to them. You have to like metal though; that is a prerequisite.

Mastodon headlined the show and it was awesome. The set list included favorites like "Blood and Thunder" and "Oblivion" but was mostly filled with songs from the newest album which the tour is named for. "High Road" live is something that everyone relatively interested in Mastodon should experience. Once again, this band has impressed me with their live performance. They aren't much of showmen, but their presence is their music not stupid human tricks with instruments. Pumped up on the awesomeness that was the show, I broke away to buy a beer and a $35 t-shirt; now that's dedication! I can't wait to go see them again and highly recommend seeing them.

If you have an interest in metal, check both bands out. I find Gojiro to be a bit more of an acquired taste but still great. Mastodon probably has a little more mass appeal and have put out some great albums. Give them a try!

Enjoy

That Was a Crazy Game of Poker: Castle of the Keys

Admittedly, I have been forsaking my blog a bit and if anyone actually looks at this regularly, I apologize. I actually have a few topics to post so let's start with my reaction to unboxing the Hordes High Command expansion, Castle of the Keys. We'll start with the box.

At first glance, this box looks chock full o' good shit. There are some great new cards including new Winds of War cards that give you a more diverse assortment of turn bonuses. All of the factions ended up getting some fun things as well. All in all, I have been pleased with the progression the expansions have taken. They add just enough to not be daunting as far as learning curve and enough to allow you new strategies in deck building. So back to the box. Lets open it up.

LOOK OUT! IT'S A SCORPION! Unlike Daenerys Targaryen, I did not have Sir Barristan to swat away the trap inside. I refuse to play any Level 7 game. I don't know what's worse; opening this box and finding this or opening a Cards Against Humanity deck and pulling the tired joke of the "big black dick" card out first. I can't explain why I am so anti-Level 7 but I am. It may have to do with the unrelenting jamming of it down our throats. On the last Primecast, they teased at the beginning about sticking around to the end for this big announcement. Surprise, surprise, sand in your eyes: Level 7 advertisement starring the most annoying thing to come out of Privateer Press, Insider 51. The segment was painful to listen to and I actually turned it off shortly after see the ploy pan out.  Anyways, after pulling away the shameless promotion, the cards are revealed.

WHAT THE FUCK?!?!?!? That's it? So let me get this straight. You made the box that big to make sure the Level 7 promo pamphlet made it in there? I can hear the fucking trees that gave their lives to make this box screaming right now. I could really use an explanation for this and I really hope the answer isn't "that's my dick in a box."

Turn The Page: "Monster Hunter International" by Larry Correia

The first thing I have to say is that I have read a lot if not all of Larry Correia's Warmachine fiction and I enjoyed it. His writing style is very readable and is free of annoying stylizations that might get tiresome while reading (this is directed at Ari Marmell). This book was on the long side for the story it was telling; however, I could definitely see the argument of the length developing the whole world in which the story takes place. I generally enjoyed the book but certain things kind of annoyed me.

First off, I tend to dislike "the one" stories in that I feel like everything comes very easily to the character and hardships/dangers aren't so bad in that you know the character will come out of it okay if not mostly okay. I think this is why the Song of Fire and Ice series has such mass appeal; no one is safe, which lends to a lot of edge of your seat moments and plenty of "what the fuck"s. This is a "the one" story. Even though things do get explained as to why he is so special, it still left me with the feeling of **yawn** by the end of it. I never felt, even when fighting the ultimate foe, that the main character was in any real danger.

The second thing that was irksome about the book was the main character reminding us how physically big and brutish he is. The character is obviously modeled after Mr. Correia, who is a large man and a gun fanatic, but I don't need to be reminded every 25-50 pages of how big the character is. You may be reading this with no familiarity with this book or the series and think that I'm over reacting; read it and tell me it doesn't get annoying.

All in all, I can't say at times I didn't feel like it was a chore to read; it had slow parts but was generally okay. I'm actually not interested in reading the rest of the series, in that I feel like it will just be this book with different monsters. That being said, I don't think I would really recommend this one. I would recommend his Warmachine fiction however.

Have Fun!

Please Don't Feed The Animals: Exigence

The smell of a new book is always a welcome aroma. I received my copy of Exigence the day after release and despite the fact I had all the models ruined for me from all the spoilers, I was eager to find out what was next in the story.

I'm going to try my damnedest to not spoil anything in the new fluff but if I do please forgive me. It seems that the involvement of dragons are becoming more frequent in the lore which makes me speculate that the next Hordes faction will be the followers of perhaps Charsaug or his twin. You will see a good deal of them as well as the involvement of another dragon, Blighterghast. All in all, I'm pleased with where the lore is going. Borka's story in this book is great but I have a trollkin bias. It is also interesting to see what Kreuger is up to as well as Barnabas finally making the necessary steps toward his final goal. It's all worth reading, is all I have to say after this mindless drabble.

As far as rules here are some of my thoughts and opinions on the factions I play. I'm an optimist about new model releases for the most part; I try to find use for the new things that come out. From what I have read on various forums and even on the different Faction Facebook pages, new releases are becoming more and more situational. People have complained about the lack of new auto-includes in these last few books. I think the game could be potentially ruined by always putting in the auto-include because it negates the need for some of the older models/units. I am very pleased with how PP does their releases; not only does everyone get something new relatively at the same time but making a new investment into recently released models is completely optional. Ok, enough of that, time to get into the factions that I care about.


Trollbloods:

Epic Borka is pretty sweet in my opinion. His initially reception by the community included some head-scratching and some "reallys?" but he seems super fun if built correctly. In my opinion, he also brings new life to that bearded bastard the winter troll, in that giving his Battlegroup immunity: cold, winter trolls have carte blanche to spray into combat without hurting their buddys.

I like both of the new units. The highwaymen seem okay but I am very excited for the fire eaters. That pig buddy sets them on fire and you get two boosted sprays with assault! Love it! Braylen also intrigues me me a bit and that model will most likely be awesome. I'm still trying to sort out her uses. Dozer and Smigg seem solid but I would have to do some play testing to really see if they are worth taking over some of my other choices for their position. Let's not forget about Horgle; I find him to be great even for just being a source of fury management. That being said, I don't feel that any of the lessees could really compete in the resource management with the Journeyman Warcasters. Blame the Fury mechanic.

Minions:

Jaga-Jaga is super cool in my book! Another caster that can actually get her force to do some damage is always very welcome. Her anti-spell tech is also pretty sweet, being able to circumnavigate defender's ward and arcane shield is great. She is most likely going to be a popular choice for list pairings.

The Sacral Vault will really help Blindwater's ranged game a good amount; it's not all about turtles anymore, but I could see the coupling of the two being pretty good. I'm pleased that there is another option now that can directly replace a posse pointwise and give a different kind of strategy.

I do have a pig army but I'll admit that I'm not well versed in them yet. The Efaarit Scouts seem like they will help the slaughterhousers out big time. Just have the scouts move up, use sniper to do one damage on a jack/beast and as long as you can get those housers into melee, you've already prepped the target for finisher. I'm thinking I could definitely utilize them in Trolls, as well as Maximus, who is just a deadly little 2 point solo.

The meat grinder is another model I might definitely invest in for my Troll army.  Love the bulldoze aspect and the knockdown/trash combo is really nice. This thing also seems like it will be a good method of taking out those pesky high DEF tarpits.

I like the releases that are relevant to my factions, even though I am slightly bummed that Blindwater only got 2 releases. I can only hope for more next time. That's it for now!

Happy Little Trees: Painting Tartans

I've been asked by a couple people how I painted the tartans on my trolls and how I picked the colors and patterns that make them up. When I decided to undertake this initially, I won't lie, I was intimidated. I was totally tempted to just go the route of colored sash wearing trollkin and call it a day. A lot of it too was laziness on my part. I imagined they were very time consuming but my dear ole' dad's bit of advice lead me to do it. The advice was: "You aren't supposed to rush hobbies; You're doing this for enjoyment and to create something that you take pride in. Why speed through it?" I don't think I could put it better; however, painting the tartans will become second nature after a little practice and will make your trollkin look awesome!

I strongly suggest to go to Google, pop "tartans" into the search box and look at what pops up under images. Literally hundreds of patterns will appear before your eyes. This is where you will want to decide on your line layout and your end target. I came up with my own color scheme and line layout (or I accidentally recreated an existing one without knowing it). It is totally okay to dumb down one of the traditional patterns, in that this will be on a miniature and even a simple version will look great.

Colors(Left to Right): P3 Beaten Purple, Iosan Green, Frostbite

First step is to pick that base color. You want your tartans to pop on your model, so that means choose a color that is directly contrasting to your armor color or the predominate color on your models. If you are using a metallic for armor, silver is usually bluish and bronze/copper is in the red family. My trolls have orange armor, so I chose purple. After painting a couple models with the purple scheme, I also decided that some future models will use a green tartan pattern that you will see to the right of the purple scheme. The bluish scheme to the far right was just me playing around. 

In the picture above, the smaller lines on the bottom is what you will see and actually paint on the model's tartan and boxes on top are what the tartans would look like if they were unfolded. I'm doing this so you can see why I put lines where they are on the model's tartan and I strongly suggest you do this little exercise prior to attempting it on a model. Lay a base coat on the tartan and shade it, so it looks like a colored sash.

Colors(Left to Right): P3 Ironhull Grey, Cryx Bane Base, Exile Blue

Step two is to paint broad vertical stripes as in the above picture. The color should be darker than the base tartan color. Usually a darker shade of the base color works, like the green scheme above but grey seems to work for just about any.

Colors(Left to Right): P3 Ironhull Grey, Cryx Bane Base, Exile Blue

In step three, I use the same color to make horizontal broad stripes. This step is where you will see your pattern begin to emerge. 

Colors(Left to Right): P3 Menoth White Base, Underbelly Blue, Murderous Magenta

Step four, aka The Hard Part, requires a thin brush, a steady hand and patience. Choose a color that will stick out from your base color. You probably want to pick anything that will be visible to be honest. The layout of these lines is completely up to you. On my purple scheme I decided to make the small lines doubled and on the green they are just single lines. You will notice that most of the time, you will not actually see these secondary lines bisect on the model.

Colors(Left to Right): P3 Heartfire, Khador Red Highlight, Necrotite Green

The final step is to choose a color that is nice and bright. This last color is the one that will make you say "wow." It is import to make it completely contrast your base color. As you can see on the blue example all the way on the right, I used green which is close to blue on the color chart. It doesn't have the same effect that a yellow, orange or red would have had. Once the color is chosen, paint the squares in the middle of the crosses that your first broad stripes created. Viola! Tartans!

While doing the last step, if you feel that some of the little squares are too bright just use a black wash and dull them out a bit. 

I also noticed that my green tartan has one thing I need to change. My little squares are orange and  my armor color is orange. You will want to avoid this, trust me; it won't look right. I will most likely use Menoth White Base for them. 

I hope this has been helpful and I will always answer questions. Enjoy.

Please Don't Feed The Animals: Trollblood Memes

After getting a Meme maker app on my phone and growing bored of making memes that featured pictures of my friends; I decided to make some Trollblood ones. Enjoy.

Fennblade Fun:


Borka Rides Again:







The Disgruntled Kriel Warrior:

These Thumbs Were Made For Gaming: Hyrule Warriors

Let's go back roughly one month ago. While playing some League of Legends with some good friends, I was informed about a game called Hyrule Warriors. I went to look it up and ended up watching video after video about it. It looked awesome! It was like Dynasty Warriors but with Zelda characters instead. It also had all my favorite button mashing, room clearing, mindless bullshit that I love.

Now, bring it on back to today. I got a copy and have been glued to it all afternoon. I am a huge fan of the Dynasty Warriors franchise and Zelda isn't too shabby either. Needless to say, I'm really digging this title. It plays like Dynasty Warriors except, dare I say, faster and with more in each map to keep you from going comatose. I'm going to put the disclaimer out there that this game may not be for everyone. It can get monotonous. However they have put in a cool crafting/powerup tree for every character that makes adding more attacks keep things interesting. The other thing I noticed is that in "Story Mode" you play as all the different characters rather than just watching Gan Ning's ass for 7-8 stages. I'm about 13 stages into story mode so far and it doesn't seem like the story is close to an ending yet. The story itself is alright to say the least, but I'm more in it to kill swathes of baddies lone wolf style.

The graphics are pretty good for WiiU and I have yet to experience the good ole' "too many soldiers on the screen" lag or "there's too many people on the screen, I'll just disappear till you kill someone" trickery that Dynasty Warriors players have grown to disdain. I don't expect anyone to pop this in and say "I'm so amped about these graphics that I'm going to wrestle a giant squid;" but they are better than bearable. I think the real showstopper for the Audio/Visual department in this title is the music.

Take all of your favorite Zelda tunes from over the years, call up the studio band that did the rockin' signature Dynasty Warrior soundtracks and WA-BAM! You get one of the most kick-ass Zelda music lineups yet. I'm super pleased with tunes.

All in all, the experience has been pretty damn good. It almost seems like the characters of Hyrule are better suited for this type of game than ancient Chinese men. I can't vouch for replay value as of yet but I'm at least not dreading the purchase. I guess one big downside is that it is on WiiU and that would necessitate buying one; hey, can't win 'em all. If you have the system, like Dynasty Warriors and Zelda then I would ask why you haven't gotten it yet. Otherwise, I wouldn't give you the "Dude, its totally worth buying WiiU for."

Warcasters, Warlocks and Feats; Oh My: Tombstone Format

I've been thinking about making my own Warmahordes format for a long time, even though I very much so enjoy the game the way it is intended to be played. After playing the tabletop skirmish game MERCS, which features a very small model count (five); I came up with a little something new. I first asked myself what I liked about MERCS the most, which was time. You can crack a game out in roughly 30 minutes giving even someone who is strapped for time (or on a lunch break) ample time to get a game in. I also love games with small model counts.

I am a huge fan of the Highlander format especially when trying to get someone past that initial "I can only handle a battle box stage" and I have read about but have yet to try out Thunderdome. So, I thought how could I do almost a MERCS style format using Warmahordes' rules? Then BOOM, it all came together. I finished my bowl of Cheerios and the Tombstone format was born!

The Earp Brothers

Tombstone Format

Lists:
-Choose a Warcaster or Warlock: Your total points to create you list are equal to 5 + WJ/WB points
-You may only select Faction solos; Partisans still come into play. No Warjacks/Warbeasts, unless they are companion models.
-Warcasters/Warlocks that come with Jacks/Beasts/Companions may use them in that their bonus points are reflective of having them.
-Lesser Warlocks that come with Beasts may use them in that their point costs are reflective of having them.

Gameplay:
-Warcasters and Warlocks alike use the rules for Warcasters. Warlocks generate Focus equal to their Fury stat every turn.
-Warbeasts act like Warjacks; they no longer use the Fury mechanic, can be allocated Focus up to their Fury stat and spend it like a Warjack. They no longer Frenzy and lose any unspent focus during the Maintenance phase. Any rule that would necessitate a Warbeast to be forced cost 1 Focus instead but the Warbeast must still be in CTRL range of its Warlock to do so. Animi may be cast; pay their cost in Focus rather than Fury.
-Models that may create other models (i.e. eAlexia, eThagrosh) may still do so.

-Use the Scenario: Grab 'n' Smash

Scenario: Grab 'n' Smash

-Place a single flag in the center of the table.
-Players all deploy up to 10" off of their respective board edge.

Special Rules
While B2B with the flag, a warrior model may forfeit either its movement or action to pick the flag up. When picked up, remove the flag from play; the model that picked it up is now the Flag Carrier. Flag Carries may not run, charge, make a slam, make a light cavalry move or be placed during their activation and lose the effects of Stealth and Incorporeal while carrying the flag. If the Flag Carrier becomes dismounted(dragoon models), stationary or knocked down, they drop the flag; place the flag back on the table B2B with the model that dropped it using the Least Disturbance rules (pg 64, Prime mkII). If the Flag Carrier is destroyed, replace its model with the flag like you would a wreck marker on a boxed warjack.

Victory Conditions
The first player to have a friendly Flag Carrier in their deployment zone immediately wins the game.

If you are wondering why I named the format Tombstone: it reminded a close friend and collaborator of mine of a western. You have a posse of the best and ready to deal out some justice; it is reminiscent of the Earp brothers and Doc Holliday. Thus, Tombstone.


Now this is the Beta; I need to play test it and get conclusive data to determine if I need to tweak things a bit or not. If you read this, try it out and have feedback for me; I would be more than grateful for it. The more I get; the more I can polish this thing. I am very interested in hearing your list ideas, so don't hesitate to share! Please, don't knock it before you try it. I want to hear why it didn't work out for you, not why you think it won't work. Help meh, help meh, please!!!

Thanks!

Preemptive FAQ

List Construction:
What types models can be in my list?
A single warcaster/warlock and Faction solos only. You don't build a battlegroup in this format.

So I spend WJ/WB points on Solos and not Warjacks/Warbeasts?
Yes!!!

Warcasters/Warlocks:
Can Warcasters/Warlocks use their feats?

Yes

Can Warlocks who come with Warbeasts still cast their Warbeast's Animus as a spell?

Yes

Are caster kills still a viable way to win?
Yes

Can pGoreshade still use his feat to summon a minimum unit of Banes?

As of right now, yes. I still need play testing to see if certain rules break the format. These can always be adjusted after seeing how things go.

[Insert Warlock/Warcaster Name] has only a Jack or Beast-centric spell list and/or feat. Doesn't that mean they will be terrible in this format?

Calaban doesn't have access to any kind of useful Arc Node that won't most likely get him killed but I still play him in normal format. Pick a different Caster/Lock if you really feel this way.

If I choose a Cygnar Warcaster can I use Mercenary models in my list?

Despite the fact that Mercenary models practically are Cygnar models, No, you must select solos only from the same Faction as the caster or ones that have the partisan rule for your chosen Faction.

If I choose a Mercenary or Minion warcaster/warlock, do I have to choose a charter or pact?
Yes, I will not tolerate the mixing of Bacon and Scales!

If I could somehow manage it; could I use a theme force?

Yes, for now. If you do, please give feedback!

Flag Carriers:
Can Flag Carriers still attack or make an actions on their activation?
Yes

Can a model forfeit its action to pick up the flag and then make a full advance?
Yes

If my dragoon is dismounted, he/she drops the flag?
Yes, your dragoon will drop the flag and need to once again forfeit movement or action to pick it up once more if you want to do so.

Can a Flag Carrier voluntarily drop the flag?
No, this may change depending on how play testing goes.

Other Questions:
How much terrain should I use?
As much as you want but personally I would use two forests and two walls total to try it out. Set it up so each player has a forest and a wall on their side of the flag. The game was designed to not take forever; too much terrain could bog it down. Here is an example I threw together in Vassal:

If I wanted to play a timed game because I have friends who take forever on their turns; how much time should be used?
As of right now, 15 minutes per player. This might change after play testing.

Will you be updating this format beyond this?
Yes, like I said this is basically the Beta of this format. The more feedback I get the better I can sculpt the guidelines.

Will you come out with new scenarios for this format?
I will give a tentative Yes. If the format is generally enjoyed by people, I will definitely try to cook up new scenarios for it.

Please Don't Feed The Animals: Trollbloods

When I took pictures of my Blindwater models, I also used the opportunity to shoot some of my trollbloods. I figured I would make you hold out till today to see them, not that you were waiting anyway. Here you go.

Please Don't Feed The Animals: Blindwater (Redo)

After my horrible failing the first time around, I have constructed a new light box. I saw how Meg Maples had done her's with a frosted garbage can and decided to try the same technique with slight variation. I know Meg wrote a tutorial but I'm going to run through how I did mine for the sake of science... and baby rabbits. It all started in the Rubbermaid section of a Walmart.

I bought this container for about $5 including tax. I liked the white lid and that fact that it came with a cover.

I then drew a squarish shape on one side with a Sharpie marker using a straight edge.

I proceeded to blow the whole squarish parts to shit by cutting this thing with a Sawzall. In hind sight, I should have used a utility knife to score the lines and then work the plastic back and forth for a controlled snap, but I'm a fucking savage, baby; that shit's no fun! I need POWAH!!!!!!

Next part comes from Home Depot. I bought two little lights which were roughly $12 a piece and two different types of lamps. The larger lamps are the 120 watt equivalent Daylight flood bulbs and the smaller are 50w equivalent. I bought them both because I wasn't sure if the 120 watters were over kill or not. I wasn't sure which to try first...

I applied the proverbial sledgehammer and slapped those 120 watt monstrosities in there. Bam! So, here are the results. I'm not 100% pleased but I will talk about that at the end. On to the photo dump.

I feel the photo quality is A LOT better however I still feel they can improve. The light box worked great, its my camera that is terrible. You won't be surprised to hear that I took these pictures with my iPhone... I will flog myself... My next mission for this project is to procure a decent camera.

Almost forgot!

The light box "folds in on itself!"